An invisible red thread connects those that are destined to meet,regardless of time,place or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break.~Ancient Chinese Proverb

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Her first and last Birthday alone....

On Sunday, our sweet baby girl turned 1.
What a bittersweet day. I think back to the first Birthday's of both of my Boys. Big parties with family and friends. Gifts galore, cake, balloons, the works.
Instead on this little girl's first Birthday, she spent the day in an Orphanage. Where I don't know how much she was held, how often she was fed, changed, and heck..I don't even know if the Orphanage workers even realized that it WAS her Birthday.
I thought about our sweet girl allday long. I prayed for her, that she may somehow feel the comfort and peace that I was sending her through my thoughts. I can't wait to hold her and make up for every single second that she was alone. We have alot of time to catch up on. Alot of kisses to give, alot of snuggles to get, alot of smiles to see and a BIG Birthday to make up for.
Today, we celebrated in our own way. We had a cake made for her. Lit a candle and made a wish for our sweet girl. We hoped and wished that she knows how loved she is and that she has a family coming for her.
We celebrated that night at one of our favorite Asian restaurants. This is the restaurant where I received the fortune cookie saying.." A pleasant surprise is in your future" just 3 days before we got the call about her file! So, it was obvious that this is where we would come to celebrate her special day. We were joined by some close friends who have known and supported us through our adoption since the very beginning. They are like family to us, and can't wait until she is here, in person, to celebrate with.

On this day, like many others, my mind drifted to another woman, on the other side of the world. My Daughter's birth mother. I will never know or meet this woman but yet I am so curious about her. I wonder if she remembered this special day. Did her heart ache? Does she look back on that day with sadness? Does she wonder about this little girl? I can't imagine having to give my sweet, tiny baby up at only a few days old. I don't think I would ever forget that day. I can't help but feel an overwhelming sadness for this lady, but an extreme gratitude for choosing LIFE for her sweet girl. Even though she would be uncertain of her Daughter's future, she gave her a chance..and for that, my heart overflows with appreciation and love.
My hope is that somehow, someway, this woman will feel peace when she thinks of the little girl she gave life to. I pray that she will feel contentment in her heart and believe that her girl has found a family who is able to care for her, the way that she was unable to. This is my prayer as our sweet girl turns 1.........

Happy Birthday, sweet one. Your last Birthday without the arms of a loving family.....